


bill dickey at the mall what will he do

by sillyideas



Category: The Eltingville Club (Comics)
Genre: Gen, computer generated text, tw guns, tw suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 06:21:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28466721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sillyideas/pseuds/sillyideas
Summary: this was nearly entirely generated by play.aidungeon.io but i need to share it with the world
Relationships: bill dickey/reader (allegedly)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	bill dickey at the mall what will he do

**Author's Note:**

> https://play.aidungeon.io

You have dragged your boyfriend Bill Dickey to the mall. He hates it here. You need him to see it. You love him. 

The mall is a big place, but you know where you want to go. It's right there in front of you. You just need to find it. The only problem is...

Bill Dickey wants to kill people. 

He's been having suicidal thoughts ever since he got out of prison and started working at the local gas station. You tried talking to him about it, but he wouldn't listen. He just kept insisting that he would be fine if he just got his gun and went out behind the garage and shot the world. 

You don't think he really would ever go through with it though. He always comes with you to the mall because he hates it here. It scares him. You...well you try to find something to talk about.

You: "Let's look at the jewelry stores. I see one we should try on."

Bill: Shoot! (walking faster)

You: "I don't think jewelry is your thing."

Bill: "I got some Cool Ranch Doritos for you if you want!"

You: "Nah, I'm good."

Bill: "What the hell you got in your mouth? A wire? You're a cop!"

You: "Calm yourself, or you'll be getting a visit from mall security."

Bill: "Hah! You always have something in your mouth. What'd you say this is?"

You: "Theater."

Bill: "Oh yeah, my cousin works there. It's his off day so..."

You: "What does he do? Wait, don't tell me. Let me guess."

Bill: "Auctioneer."

You: "Yeah I guessed that too."

Bill: "You're not getting off that easy. What's that thing you have in your hand?"

You: "A...uh...a...uh..."

Bill: "Amp? This is a phone, dipshit! I can see the web page!"

You: "Yeah...uh...well it's sort of private."

Bill: "What's your name?"

You: "Uh...it's John. John..."

Bill: "John who? John Smith?"

You: "Yeah..."

Bill: "That's not a name. That's the name of a fruit! Look, if you got something to say, better say it to my face, not on this thing!"

You: "I'm...I'm..."

Bill: "I thought so. Fuck! Why can't I ever meet a girl who doesn't have a mouth on her? Oh wait..."

You: "Bill, you can calm down. It's just a phone."

Bill: "I can't calm down! I'm dying to kill someone and no one will listen to me! They all think I'm a terrorist who needs to be locked up!"

You: "Look, you're obviously frustrated. Why don't you go wait in the parking lot and just get it over with."

Bill: "Yeah...I guess I will."

You: "Also, just call attention to yourself and they'll kick you out."

Bill: "Yeah, I know..."

Bill goes outside. You hope he's okay.

You: "shall we?

The food court is empty save for a few old people you don't know and a few teenagers who are too stupid even to be the old people you don't know. You find an empty table and sit down.

A few minutes later...

Bill Dickey: "Hey, do you mind if I join you?"

You: "Sure."

Bill sits down and stares ahead. You look at him and see he's holding a revolver in his hands.

You: "What's that?"

Bill: "This? Just a revolver. Actually, it's a six shooter."

You: "A what? No, I mean what are you planning on doing with it?"

Bill: "I'm going to shoot you with it of course. Or, I might eat a burrito. Depends on if I feel hungry or not."

You: "What?"

Bill: "Look, I'm tired of being alone. Or at least I'm tired of being lonely. I want someone to talk to. Someone who'll listen and not think I'm getting some weird idea. I'm not. I'm just sick of being alone. I want a friend."

You: "Well...I'm sorry you're feeling that way, but I don't think it's healthy for you to just go around shooting and killing people just because you're lonely."

Bill: "Why not? It's not like anyone would miss me. Pfft. What's so wrong with wanting a friend? Don't you think someone would want to be your friend if they had the chance?"

You: "I..."

Bill: "Think about it."

You: "..."

Bill: "Well, are you going to sit there and eat all by yourself or what?"

You: "..."

Bill: "Oh, I can see you want to say something. What is it?"

You: "Well...it just concerns me that you're not actually friends with people. I mean, I've never known you to speak with anyone beyond a few snarling words. How can I know if you're being genuine or not?"

Bill: "So you don't trust me. Nice."

You: "It's not that I don't trust you, it's more like I don't know you. I mean, are you really a friendly person? Or are you just fucking with everyone? I mean, are you actually getting pleasure by witnessing the distress you're causing others?"

Bill: "Ha ha! See? You're funny. Now, are you going to eat that chili?"

You: "Yeah, I guess so. Just wish this whole thing was a little less fucked up."

Bill: "Like this guy? Hey, maybe we could have been friends. Oh well. Live and learn."

Bill puts the revolver in his lap and holds the gun up to his mouth.

Bill: "And live. Or rather die. Learn from your mistakes. Don't make them again. And don't you dare pity me."

He blows his brains out and dies.

You: "WAIT!"

No response.

You: "ARGH!


End file.
